Email From Portland by Kerul

yesterday i moved my things back to the realm of
the goddess palace.
things seem optimistic, raising money to travel
as i have been hired back to the reliable food front,
taking shifts as other people don't want them...
works for me, as far as i can see.
i know the obvious elusiveness of my perspective
is just a preface to my next discursive exploration...
i find myself feeling situationally separate ...
from That... from Them...
However i name it. babylon. routine. mundane
old friends that i connect with
although it's unnecesary, and counterproductive,
to create drama, i am looking at the contrast
between my lifestyle choices
and theirs
alienation is my one response
to perspectives that involve
stability. predictability. continuity of specific actions.
this perspective is useful
i am on the outside
looking in.
or on the inside looking out (more accurate)
this way of looking
helps me remain independent, to
focus on europe in july
although the polarity of it is pretty silly
the seeds i sow with intention get overlooked
because of too much hype
or perhaps the people i am connecting with presently
have other things that keep them on the planet,
without the hassles and conflicts that come from
inner-steller personal exploration.

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